Is Self Care on Your To Do List?

Are you bottom of your list?  

Is self care on your to do list?

Ladies let's talk about looking after ourselves.

I mean by the time we get to, let's call it midlife - we have things sorted out.

On the one hand, we are the women that are described as 'having it all together'.

We've fallen in love- and out, and survived.

We've travelled the world.

We have it all under control.  Kind of.

Kids, jobs, ageing parents and not to mention our own changing bodies.

On the other, we are everything to everyone.

The full of love mum to our kids.

The patient daughter.

The loving wife.

The supportive best friend.

The smiling professional in the office.

The helpful neighbour.

And somewhere at the very bottom of the list, after we have done everything for everyone else(including your friend's second cousin) there is one other person - ourselves.

When I listen to my customers, (and myself) that is my biggest take away.  We are all so busy and we are always bottom of that list.

And I am here to tell you that sometimes that is not enough. And that you are allowed more.

So here are 5 easy steps to survive all of that busy-ness and prioritise you.

1 - Best Friends & Laughter

Reconnect with your best friends.  Whether it be face to face or using Zoom, carve out some time on a regular basis to get together and laugh. 

There's always something else on that do list.  There are always more things to do.  But that is the point.  There always will be. 

Do yourself a favour and commit to a monthly call or face to face catch up, just because. Laugh, cry, reminisce about all the crazy things you did - or even better plan some more crazy things to do next week. 

2 - Your Plan

Identify some non negotiables that are specific to you. 

Some time first thing before the rest of the house is up to drink coffee, gaze into the garden, plan that book you've never had time to write. 

Read something lovely for 20 minutes that is not related to work, kids or parents. 

Treat yourself to a digital description to your favourite glossy mag, and flip though while sipping your favourite latte.  (I've just discovered Readly, and no I'm not on commission - but hundreds of mags to flip though for the price of pretty much a single mag).  

The what does not matter.  What matters is you work out what those non negotiables are for you.

3 - Find a Routine That Works

Find a self care routine that works for your circumstances. Based on when you are likely to have most time, decide whether it is going to be morning or evening. 

When youare rushing have your favourites that you know work.  Fast and easy.  And when you have a bit more time, flip toyour routine. 

An aromatherapy shower.  A soak in warm, fragrant water.  A 5 minute facial massage with your favourite face oil before bed.  Slathering your hands in a beautiful balm, and breathing in those aromatherapy oils to relax you before drifting off to sleep.

4 - Your Time

Build time into your diary to let off steam.  If it's running that you find cathartic (and let me just say how impressed I am) do it. 

Get outside, build it into your routine and allow yourself time to get out if your day to day stuff and have that time. 

Kick boxing, meditating, gardening- you know what works for you, just allow yourself time to follow your passions. 

You will feel better for it and be nicer to be around, and have more ability to give back and face your day to day. 

5 - Be Kind To Yourself

We are so hard on ourselves.  Much harder on ourselves than we are on anyone else. 

It's almost like we want to torture ourselves.

That might mean changing the habit of a lifetime and spending time on building a positive mental image. 

Not blaming ourselves for things completely out of our control. 

Not beating ourselves up about what we should have done better. 

Let it go. You are enough.